Speaking In Love
Posted on Feb 13, 2008 under Children |Speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into Him who is the Head, this , Christ.Ephesians 4:15
Have you ever met someone who takes pride in their honesty? You know what I mean. These are the people who proclaim proudly that they may hurt feelings but at least they’re honest. Or they call it being outspoken, confident, in-your-face. Whatever they call it, it all amounts to one thing: honesty spoken without love hurts and discourages.
As parents, we want to communicate our values and thoughts to our children, but we have to remember to do that with kindness and allow our children to see our genuine concern for them. The difference? Well, if your teen daughter is wearing inappropriate clothing, you’d be better off suggesting something more appropriate and explaining how nice she would look in something else than if you’d simply blurt out that her clothes make her look like a tramp.
I think that sometimes we parents handle situations with hurtful words because we’re afraid. We see ourselves losing control of our children and that frightens us. We see our children forming their own opinions and sometimes that doesn’t mesh with our own values. That’s a scary thought. We want to protect our kids but our fear takes over and we lash out at the very people we love so much: our kids.
The best way to allay the fear and speak honestly to our children with love, is to always trust in the Lord. Follow His way, pray that he replace our fear with faith and allow God to help us to parent. That’s the winning combination.
